Somedays I'm glad I live in SC

We in SC have our political problems. A governor who won't resign. He's being pushed by the Lt. Governor and state legislators and they are in his own party. Some (most?) of the pushing is politically motivated and based on old problems.

But at least I don't live in Massachusetts. With the passing of Sen. Kennedy, there's now an open Senate seat. In most states, the governor would simply appoint someone to fill the seat and everyone would move on. But back in 2004, the now deceased Sen. Kennedy pushed for the state to create new legislation that would require a special election for empty seats.

Back in 2004, Mitt Romney (a Republican) was governor. John Kerry (a Democrat) was running for president and everyone thought he would be elected. This would have left his seat empty and Romney might have appointed a non-Democrat for the seat. So, Kennedy pushed for a change in the law.

Fast forward five years and the table is now reversed. There's a Democratic governor who, if the law allowed, could appoint a Democrat to be Kennedy's replacement. Instead, by current law, a special election must be held and the state will have to go with only one senator for 4-5 months.

Of course, my way of thinking is that this isn't such a bad thing. Sen. Kennedy was very ill most of this year and hasn't been able to do much with the seat. So what will be different? But to alleviate that issue, Sen. Kennedy last week sent a letter, encouraging them to change the law (again).

Isn't it great when politicians change the law to fit their parties needs? It makes me so anxious for the new health care, knowing that they can change things when they feel like it...

Mars & Venus for dummies

I said in my last post that I had trouble understanding the Mars & Venus thing. Once I realized that this was talking about men & women and not about planets, I was in even more trouble. But it seems like Governor Mark Sanford understands even less about the subject, so I figured I could help him out a little.

First, if you're hiding a relationship with an Argentinan mistress and you keep emails lying around, don't send your wife in to look for financial documents. Yep, Sanford sent his wife into his office and she found out about his affair. He had to confess and blow up the whole thing. It's almost like he wanted to get caught.

Second, once caught, don't ask permission from your wife to go see your mistress. Somehow, this seems obvious, but it must've gone over his head. The governor asked several times over the last few months if he could go see his sweetheart again. Maybe he was absent on the day they covered this in Cheaters 101 during his college days, you just don't do it. That's what cutting class will get you. I can just hear the conversation - "can I please just see her, just this once? I promise, we just need to talk." Yeah, right. Just talk.

Third, and this is important, if you're trying to make things up with your wife - especially if she seems agreeable to the idea - don't call someone else your soul mate. Now this is certainly one of those mars/venus things, but women tend to be a little jealous. Saying something like this is almost as bad as saying something like "yeah, she could lose a couple pounds" or "she doesn't look half bad once she puts the makeup on."

Now I should quickly point out that none of this comes from first hand knowledge. I did not attend Cheaters 101 class while in college (nor at anytime since) and didn't even sign up for it. My wife is very understanding, but has let me know in no uncertain terms what would happen if this ever became an issue with us (it's a scary story). And most importantly, I have NO DESIRE to find out what "the other side of the fence" is like (and the fear factor helps). My side of the fence is quite nice thank you.

But it sure seems the governor could learn a couple of lessons.

A note to my daughters/daughters-in-law

Last week, I published a note on the Sanford affair and included a note to my sons/sons-in-law. Now it's time for a counterpoint, a message to the girls in my life.

I need to start with a couple of strong caveats. I do not mean this as an attack or even a statement about Mrs. Sanford. I don't know (and don't want to know) anything about her marriage and (to date) she has acted with class. In fact, this doesn't apply to anyone who has had problems in the past, it applies to future actions only. Second, no where does this give any man any excuse to cheat. That's inexcusable. I'm hoping I can tell some women how to make their marriage better.

And my final caveat is that I am not now, nor ever have been (or desire to be) a woman. I struggled with the mars/venus thing when I thought it related to planets, once I discovered it was about men & women I was even more confused. I claim no special knowledge about women, a lesson I've learned the hard way several times.

That said, I saw something in Mark Sanford's letters that needs to be pointed out. He was looking for someone to confide in. He was looking for someone to share his daily life with. He found it in the wrong place.

There's a song that says "he'll have good times doing things that you don't understand." You don't have to understand the things your husband enjoys. But you can still listen to him talk about those things. Or go watch him do them. Cheer him on. And "if you love him, ... be proud of him." There isn't a man alive who doesn't want his woman to be proud of him. And he needs to hear it.

You also need to watch yourself and choose your friends carefully, especially the opposite sex. If you're confiding with another man things you haven't confided with your husband, you're committing emotional adultery. This can quickly lead to physical adultery.

Ok, there I said it. I've probably proven how little of the mars/venus thing I understand. And who knows how many times I'll have to clean up the mess I created with this post, but at least it's out.

SC Governor found out

A couple days ago, I posted that the SC Governor was missing. Well, he turned up yesterday. Not in a good way.

By now, most everyone knows the whole story. Originally, no one knew where he was for 5 days, then they said he was hiking, then it was found he was in Argentina. Having an affair. A tryst. A fling. Whatever name you want to put on it.

At this point, I think the governor should resign. He has lied to his staff and to the state for the last year. Some of the lines were not overt, he never said he wasn't having an affair. No wagging his finger at the TV saying "I did not have sex with that woman." But regardless, he lied. And the next time he stands up to fight fiscal irresponsibility, we will wonder about his purpose. He has shown a willingness to lie to his wife, his children and to all of us.

I don't think he should be impeached. I haven't read the SC constitution, so I'm assuming it's like the US constitution. That allows impeachment for "high crimes and misdemeanors." This (so far) was neither. Lying is not the same as perjury (like lying to congress). There may come some facts about his misuse of public funds and my feeling on this may change. But for now, I don't think he should be impeached.

My hat is off to his wife. She has shown a willingness to try to rebuild the marriage. She didn't have to do this. The choices are all hers at this point. But, she seems willing to try. What a classy lady.

I want to give a message to my sons and sons-in-law. Watch yourself carefully. If it can happen to this man, it can happen to you. Never, never develop a "dear, dear friend(ship)" with a lady. It can only lead to problems. In this case, Sanford apparently had a friendship with this lady for 7 years, before it turned sexual. In my opinion, his adultery started long before the last year. I firmly believe that you can't have a close relationship with any woman other than your wife.

And finally, we need to pray for this man. It's not clear to me if he is truly repentant yet. But he has completely destroyed his wife and family. If he takes my advice and resigns, he will lose his job. Where will his income come from? We need to pray for his wife and his kids.

SC Governor missing?

It's been all the talk on the local news, our governor is missing. Most of my readers are out of state, and therefore unconcerned. But I promise you, this story gets better.

Seems at least one person has a unique idea of what he might be doing. You see, Governor Sanford is known for being conservative. In fact, he takes conservative to a new level, refusing to ask for some of the stimulus money because it would cause more debt for US citizens.

In the Governor's first term of office, he decided to make a point out of his desire for fiscal conservativeness. He wanted to come out against pork spending in the state budget, so he walked into the legislative office with a pig under each arm.

His latest disappearance occurred over the weekend, with his last known location somewhere outside Atlanta. His own wife said she didn't know where he was. Finally, last night, his spokesman said he was hiking the Appalachian Trail.

The interesting turn of events is pointed out by this Christian Science Monitor story that realizes that the hiking takes place on Naked Hiking Day.

Now the thought of this conservative governor hiking naked may amuse some people, but it's a picture I personally don't need. Even the write of the article admits it's unlikely.

Alas, I just heard news that Governor Sanford will emerge tomorrow (hopefully fully clothed). The mystery will soon be over. But it's had a lot of play on the local news.