Thoughts on being a hermit

I think I've always been fascinated with the idea of being a hermit. Just dropping out from society and running away from it all. I thought about it many times as a kid (doesn't every kid?).

It's not that my life has been bad, it hasn't. I've been blessed in many ways. Sure, there are times when job or life pressures overwhelm me, but there's always tomorrow and when you look at the grand scheme of things, does it really matter if one thing falls off your oh-too-crowded plate? But there's a certain allure...

The first time I blogged about it was in 2005 (here), then two years later I posted about it again (here). Then less than a month later I posted about Drew Peterson who thought his wife just ran away and Ian Darwin who actually did run away for five years (see here).

Then in 2008, I posted twice about being a hermit: in March about a man who sold everything to run away (here) and in April, a some-what tongue-in-cheek post about running away (here).

So with all this hermit/running away fascination, what keeps me from doing it? Well first, life in the here-and-now isn't that bad. In fact, it's quite good. And if I ever doubt it, all I have to do is look around and see pictures of my family. And if it does get bad, I can look at where I've been and see that He's gotten me through a lot worse and will get me through the day's problems.

Which brings me to my point. Becoming a hermit would mean hurting a lot of people that I really care about. Back in 2009, a man, named Bruce Windsor in my town did just that. He found an interesting way to become a hermit, he robbed a bank. Life was at a bad point for him and the walls were caving in. By robbing the bank, he ran away for 25-years-to-life. (He got caught. Read my blog posts here and here).

Now I read where someone else has done it. Brenda Heist simply ran away from her family in 2002 and never contacted them again until earlier this week (full story here). Her family thought she was dead. She caused them a lot of grief. Now that she's back in the real world, her daughter doesn't want to speak to her. Which shows how wrong it is to simply run-away.

Still, there is that Siren song, calling...

Do-Over begins

A few months ago, I posted an entry about Ian Usher, who wanted a d0-over in his life. Seems Ian was tired of his current life, wanted to sell it and start over. Well, it seems like he's accomplished his goal (at least on the surface) and the auction is over.

The winning bid was $399,300, an earlier bid of $2m was found to be fake. My earlier report indicated he was hoping for $390,000, so he didn't do too bad.

Ian packed up his life: his house, car, etc. including his job and friends. Yep, his employer promises to give the buyer a try at his former job and he's sending a list of his friends.

So why do it? "Of course, at the root of it all was a girl" according to this article. Makes sense. Most of the major decisions in my life can be traced to a female. Some for the better. Some, well I'd rather not think of those.

Now Ian gets to start over. Good luck Ian. I hope you find what you're looking for. More importantly, I hope you get away from the things you don't want.

Mid-Life crisis

I've long said that I was cheated out of my mid-life crisis. When I turned 40, personal events in my life dictated that I remain focused. I was a new single dad, raising three kids 15 and under, I didn't have time for a mid-life crisis. As much as I wanted a Mazda Miata (I figured I could park it in the back of my pick-up), I settled for a mini-van as my second vehicle.

But now I'm thinking maybe I could have a post-mid-life crisis. I have a little over a year left before I hit the next big birthday (I will be out of town that year so no surprise parties allowed). Maybe I could squeeze it into the next year. I've made it known for a couple of years that I'm not satisified with my job. I'm very good at it, but I'm at the peak of my position. There's no "upward mobility" left and it's just getting boring. I have no interest in management, I've seen too closely what they do.

I've blogged several times about becoming a hermit or getting "lost" in such a way that no one can find me. But when it comes down to it, I enjoy my family and friends way too much. So maybe I could just quit my job, and start something new. Kinda risky, especially for a man who doesn't like risk. But who knows? I'm open to suggestions.

P.S. If I do have a post-mid-life crisis, I may get that Miata and change jobs, but there's little else resembling a mid-life crisis in the works. I have a wonderful wife now and as we approach our 7th anniversary, there will be no 7th inning stretch.

I want a do-over

Seems that a man in Australia wants a do-over. Ian Usher is putting his entire life up for auction on E-bay. The lucky winner will get his house and all it's contents, his car, his motorcycle, jet ski and parachuting gear.

The winner will also get Ian's friends and job: He's promised to introduce the buyer to his friends (after that it's up to them) and his employer has agreed to give the buyer a chance at his job (two week trial period, followed by three months, then permanent if it all works out).

Seems Ian had a bad break-up with his wife of five years and his life is just full of bad memories. Not sure how those get sold on E-bay, but he's expecting to get around $390,000 for the package. He hopes to head out of his house with his wallet and passport and board the next plane with an available seat and head off into the sunset (or sunrise depending on the time of day and direction).

I've always promised my kids that my house could be a "city of refuge" for them, but this is tempting. I posted a while back that I had desires to go off and become a hermit, but this is even more dramatic. Looking back and my blog posts, I've even posted that desire twice, two years apart, so it's not a new desire. And Drew Peterson is convinced that's what happened to his wife and there are books that tell you how to do it. It seems to me that the e-Bay way is a good one.

Did Drew Peterson kill his wife?

All over the news, you'll see stories like this one about Drew Peterson in Illinois who is accused of killing his fourth wife. Her body hasn't been found, but they have exhumed his third wife's body and at least one investigator believes he killed her too (I found an interview with wife#2, but gave up finding anything on wife#1, the reports are just too sick). Mr. Peterson thinks wife#4 ran off with another man and just doesn't want to be found.

Now, teleport across the pond to merry old England where it's reported that John Darwin who has been gone over five years and presumed dead. The wreckage of his kayak washed on shore in March 2002 and a coroner pronounced him dead. His wife Anne, collected the life insurance money and recently moved to Panama. Now John has turned himself in claiming amnesia.

So what ties these two stories together? Is Anne Darwin's wife, Drew Peterson's next target? Or did Stacy Peterson, run off with John Darwin? No, nothing so sinister, no great conspiracy. I am just fascinated with the idea that people can run away and never be found. It turns out there are even books written about the idea: "Hide Your Assets & Disappear: A Step-By-Step Guide to Vanishing Without a Trace"

Let's see, didn't I say something a few days ago about moving to the mountains and becoming a hermit? (blog post here) If Santa wanted to bring me a book, maybe the above would be a good one...